So, here I am , day 7 after surgery and time for a quick update. Not going to say too much about the physical side of recovery (ice, rest, physio, we all know how that roughly goes) but I'm struggling a bit today on other fronts, if I'm honest.
We've had a few people drop in over the weekend - to chat and also to play with the kids - and it has been great to feel a bit more normal in that respect, but I've been surprised how wiped out I've felt after each visit and how strong the urge to just go back to bed and sleep has been.
In normal circumstances, that would be fine but I can see how much pressure my other half - and therefore the kids too - are under so I'm trying my best to do 'something' useful to help. Yesterday it was folding the laundry and trying to get my own drinks/snacks sorted where possible; this morning it has been helping the kids get dressed and breakfasted and unloading and re-loading the dishwasher before heading back to the sofa. After that 'exhertion', I was struggling to read even lightweight magazines and could feel my eyes closing as I did so.
I've taken two weeks off work 'completely' but as luck/Murphy's Law (delete as appropriate) would have it, we've had a number of new business enquiries in that time, which need responses before I'm due to be back in part-time (next week). That kind of work (research, strategy development and pricing etc) still falls to me so, while the team is keeping expected delivery going brilliantly, there's no-one else I can sub this to. Both projects are right up our street and I don't want to miss out on them as it's a pretty unpredictable time economically - I'm a big believer in making hay while the sun shines.
All I want to do is curl up and sleep right now but I know I've got one proposal to review and send, and another to research and create. It's Monday so I'd really like to just get these done and then I don't have to think about them for the rest of the week but I'm also feeling tired, a bit woozy still, and not sure my brain is really capable of thinking clearly enough to make a good job of either.
Also, I managed to turn onto my side last night for the first time (woohooooo!) and fell asleep in that position before waking up half an hour later in pain and trying to turn over again was uncomfortable, to say the least. My leg's still quite sore so I'd like to take some of the stronger pain killers again (I've been limiting the codeine/oramorph as don't like how it makes me feel (codeine)/ I don't want to pass out again (oramorph) but if I take some, the pain will reduce but I'll be too woozy to get these jobs done.
Or maybe I'll feel better if I just do that, fall asleep and wake up more refreshed and comfortable, and will be better placed to sort the work things out?
So this is the reality of 'being the boss' - at work certainly, at home up for debate. It doesn't stop, however much you just need to rest and focus on other stuff. Out of office replies and redirections mean nothing to some people and, let's say, the definition of 'urgent' needs some refinement. I'm ever grateful for the luxury of being busy at work - after spending over a decade building the business from nothing, including some dodgy times, the alternative is not one I want to consider. But sometimes I do hanker after the security of being an employee and being able to take actual sick leave/having chance to recover and breathe.
Anyway, time to stop wallowing in self pity. I am lucky in so many way. Deep breath, crack on...
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